{Day 8}: your creative soul {part 1}

"I'm not very creative" doesn't work. There's no such thing as creative people and non-creative people. There are only people who use their creativity and people who don't.

 Unused creativity doesn't just disappear. It lives within us until it's expressed, neglected to death, or suffocated by resentment and fear." 

~Dr. Brene Brown in The Gifts of Imperfection

This was one of the most freeing things I read in the book The Gifts of Imperfection. There's no such thing as creative people and non-creative people. Hmmm. That was a totally new thought. I no longer had any excuses not to create. Something. Some how.

One day, recently, I sat down and jotted down some of the obstacles I encounter when I think about being creative.  I was surprised to easily come up with a list of about thirteen right off the top of my head. I've narrowed my list to ten.


Top 10 obstacles to creating:

1. feeling "locked up" on the inside
2. time
3. comparison
4. perfectionism
5. "not good enough"
6. fear of what others will think
7. fear of rejection
8. lack of motivation
9. lack of inspiration
10. wondering if any of it matters

Things that go through my head.  What matters anyway? What really matters if I don't create? If I don't write or paint, or decorate my home, what does it matter? What does any of it mean, anyway? (pretty negative stuff, huh?)

It's not that my soul doesn't want to create. It really does! It's just that for so long I was afraid of showing up and being seen. I was caught in the comparison trap that kills creativity. I was also afraid of what my friends and family would think. I was afraid of not being good enough. 

Tomorrow, I want to share Part 2 with you. I want to share what's happened as I've taken some steps to unleash intentional creativity. Hopefully, it will encourage you that you, too, are a creative being and your soul wants to create! 

Here's to learning to let our creative souls soar!

Blessings to you, friend,

~Anne

Thanks for joining me on this 8th day of my Soul Spa series! Check back here for a list of all 31 Days of Soul Spas posts! Or if you'd like to receive each post in your inbox, simply type your email into the box on the sidebar of my blog!

I'm taking part in #write30days, a project with 100's of other bloggers each writing on a topic for the month of October. Head on over to write31days.com to see what it's all about

for when you have shaky knees

My journal lately has become something much different than it used to be.

It used to be all prayers, and mostly whining and begging God to do this or that, or give me this or that, and do it yesterday.

I'm not beyond giving Him thanks, but my words have been slightly weighted on the "gimme" end of the spectrum.

I've noticed a shift in recent months. I haven't recently gone back to study old journals, but I do occasionally peruse the previous entries in my current one.

Instead of lots of begging God for what I don't have, it seems I'm recognizing more what I do have.

I'm comparing the tone of my journal to what's happening in my life.

I'm more content where I'm at. 

It was a struggle to get here.

I'm noticing more lists in my journal. 

Lists of things I've learned.
Lists of possible book topics.
Prayers of gratitude.
Answered prayers.

I see in these pages that I've stepped out and done some hard things recently, but been truly blessed for the doing.

I've stepped into some arenas where the so-called critics seemed like they might devour me, but instead I wasn't devoured. I re-discovered courage to use my voice. Courage to be me in my raw form.

Old patterns threatened to take over, but didn't.

In stepping out into the arena, so often I find strength and beauty there instead of the critics I was expecting.

Strength, power, courage and voice rise up to meet each step I take.

This is beautiful to me.

When I was a little girl, I remember my Dad teaching me the simple melody of an old hymn on the piano.

The words of the chorus go like this:

Trust and obey
For there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus
But to trust and obey

These words come to mind as I think of taking steps of courage into the arena.

Through shaky knees, sweaty palms and a racing heart, the steps into the arena---silencing the fear gremlins---has brought liberty.  

Freedom.

How about you? What's the arena you find yourself needing to enter?
Give yourself credit for taking steps to enter through shaky knees, sweaty palms and a racing heart. I applaud you!

Blessings to you, friend!








Linking up today with Holley Gerth at Coffee for Your Heart.

it's no Picasso

Well, I'm back at it again.

Last fall I took the Oprah.com/Brene' Brown online class based on Brene's book The Gifts of Imperfection. I absolutely loved the class and when I heard that she was going to offer a part two (to cover the last half of her book) in April, I about jumped out of my chair!

Part two started on Thursday of this week. I didn't get a chance to do any of the work until yesterday, so I felt a little bit behind. 

There were three or four short videos to watch. 
And, then, the creative assignments.

One of the very first assignments Brene' wanted us to do was to draw our self portrait. 

Using ONLY crayons. 

Oh. My. Gosh. 

"Let's get back to that place where we created art with wild abandon."

~Brene' Brown

I don't know if I ever have drawn a self portrait! And, surely not without sketching in pencil first and erasing and sketching and erasing until I nearly had erased all of the paper away. 

Because, that is how much of a perfectionist I am! 

It just amazes me how deeply ingrained in me is this compulsion to edit myself. To edit the version of me that anyone sees. This editing is done subconsciously most of the time to protect myself.

it's no Picasso, but it's me

In fact, this blog is an attempt to put my true self out there. As I said this week, it took a lot of courage to attempt a blog. Two of them went by the wayside until A Ready Listener was born.

Writing my heart is one thing. 

Drawing an elementary quality drawing of myself and letting other people see it, is an entirely different story.

I sat down yesterday afternoon. In front of me was my journal. 

And, my daughter's box of 48 Crayola crayons. The only consolation is that the crayons are basically brand new, and who doesn't love coloring with brand new crayons?

I soooo wanted to go find a pencil! No one would notice! No one was watching me and making sure that I followed Brene' Brown's rules for this creative assignment! I could have sketched to my heart's content and then covered the pencil lines with crayon.

But, I did what Brene' told me to. (I am compliant that way.) Plus, you know what? Brene' had already done her self portrait crayon masterpiece and showed the world. It was no Picasso, and she was smiling and even laughing and poking fun at her drawing saying, "Do you see the resemblance?"

I thought to myself, if Brene' Brown can do this and show everyone in the world, I can do this. 

So, I sat there staring at my blank journal page a few minutes. 

{Oh, actually, I have to say that I did look up a very basic drawing demo and he told where the eyes needed to be (half way down on the oval face) and where the tops of the ears should be (even with the eyes).}

Is that cheating? Nah!

That's all I did to prepare. Honest.
Then, my crayons went on the white page. 

Once I drew half of the oval because I didn't want my "apricot" crayon I used for my head to show in my hair, and I started putting on the other features and drawing my hair, I actually started to have fun. 

Do you think that is Brene' Brown's point for these creative assignments?

Brene is testing my self compassion

Well, that, and... 

giving up on the misconception of perfection and embracing imperfection.

I'm game for kicking these perfectionist tendencies to the curb.

Stick with me. I'll be sharing more of what I'm learning from the class as I go along!

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Thanks for stopping by!

Linking up today with Beth at Three Word Wednesday.

10 Things I learned in November

It's so easy to get into the habit of not writing regularly after writing for a whole month straight in October. So, I'm thankful for Emily Freeman's link up for sharing the things we learned during the month of November! 

Here are a few things I've learned in the past month in random order. I invite you to hop on over to Emily's blog, Chatting at the Sky, to read what other people learned in November!

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1.  Frozen might be rivaling Tangled and Wall-e for my favorite animated film. Even though my kids are now adults, we all still love animated movies, so our whole family went to see Frozen for our annual Thanksgiving movie tradition. This movie is over-the-top cute. You should go see it, whether you are two or ninety two.

2. As one of the lead characters in Frozen, Kristen Bell has a great singing voice! I loved her in You, Again, but I didn't know she could sing. Which isn't saying a lot because I don't really keep up with which celebrities can and cannot sing. 

3. I read an article last week while on the elliptical about weight loss tips from a gal who lost 100 lbs. (is this ironic, or just coincidental that I was reading about weight loss while on an elliptical? I'll have to ask my daughter.) Anyway.....the tip that stood out to me was to focus on my strengths while on my fitness journey.

I decided that I'd rather lift weights mostly on machines in a different part of the gym instead of with dumbbells right near all the Arnold Schwartzeneggers. I was much more comfortable doing the machines. A small change, really, but the impact was huge for my mood while lifting.

4. Gratitude is best when practiced. What I mean is that often I think about being grateful when something good is happening. Brene Brown and Oprah reminded me in last week's online class that gratitude is a practice that we learn by doing. 

We learn by being grateful even when we don't feel like being grateful. 

Oprah says, Gratitude leads to joy. Brene says, Joy is additive. When we practice gratitude we fill our joy reserves. This is not huge information, but it felt like a mental shift happened in my brain. I dragged out the gratitude journal that I started in 2012 and began adding to it again at about #436. I felt so much better about my life after practicing gratitude in this way. 

5. There was a day about two weeks ago, that I felt absolutely stuck with an issue in my life. Prayer wasn't cutting it. Journaling didn't really help all that much. What I needed to do was to phone a friend. So, I did. (sometimes I'm reluctant) I called a friend and basically said "help." She did. She listened and she understood because she'd been in my shoes. Never under estimate the power of phoning a friend when you need help! I'm still learning this.


6. Through this Brene Brown online class I've been given assignments to work on an art journal. I've journaled prayers and thoughts and feelings for years. What I've never done until November was to work on an art journal. I'm kind of intimidated by it. Meaning that I suffer from a huge case of perfectionism. 


But, I'm realizing that being perfect is overrated, not to mention impossible! Actually getting my hands in there and being creative is the idea. And, I've noticed that when I work on my art journal (simple water color painting and drawing) my mood always elevates. Bonus!

7. I had been feeling especially bad about myself and my weight because of the category the trainer at the gym put me in after he weighed me. But, when I went to Maurice's to try on jeans, Taylor the jeans specialist was there. She was truly a jeans artist (and an angel). She said she had read and studied up on their jeans and which styles fit which body types. 

She brought me a pair of sparkly pocket jeans in the dressing room and said,

"Have you seen the traveling pants movie? Well, these jeans are just like that. Everyone who tries them on loves them! They are my go-to jeans!" 

I left with those jeans. And, I left feeling so uplifted by Taylor's care and encouragement in helping me find jeans that made me feel like a new woman! Jeans faeries really do exist! This one's name is Taylor.

8. On the same jeans shopping trip, I asked my college daughter if I was too old for sparkly pocket jeans. She said, "Not if you like them!" So, I guess fifty is not too old for sparkly pocket jeans because that's exactly what I got.

9.  I've discovered that I can get into a creative flow in my art journal or writing while listening to Jim Brickman radio station on Pandora. I've also discovered Anthony Burger so I added Anthony's piano loveliness as variety to this station. Today, I appropriately switched over to Jim Brickman Holiday station, which is working just as well. I love lovely piano music. Without lyrics. And, apparently it likes me.

10. Favorite quotes written in my journal this month. 

"Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there." ~Rumi

"When she transformed into a butterfly, the caterpillars spoke not of her beauty, but of her weirdness. They wanted her to change back into what she always had been. But she had wings."~Dean Jackson

Each of these quotes deserve their own blog post, so you never know what might be coming up.

Thanks for stopping by! I hope you are having a great start to December!

~Anne

Dare to Be: Shame resilient {Day 28}

I admit it. In the matter of a couple of months, I've become an all-out Brene Brown fan girl. If you've been following along on the 31 Day journey, you already know about me reading her book Daring Greatly.

I am now reading The Gifts of Imperfection. I'm learning things in a workshop and an online Life Class. 

art journal

She said in the online class that she wears jeans all the time because she needs a pocket to carry around her permissions slips in! I love her!


I have been brought to tears by her writings more than once. I think it's because I feel validated. Her research and her writings are validating things that I've been feeling about myself for YEARS. (if I could, I would hug her for this.)

Her research in shame resilience is normalizing shame for me.

What is shame, you ask?


She defines shame as this:

Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.

 ~Brene Brown

What does shame feel like, you ask?

Shame is that warm feeling that washes over us, making us feel small, flawed, and never good enough. ~B.B.

I am realizing that in several areas in my life I've felt shame. For a long time. And, I'm also realizing that I've felt shame about my shame!! What a mess!

art journal page for online class

I am learning some key things about shame that are changing me and how I think about myself and others in my life profoundly.

1. shame thrives in secrecy and silence

2. shame is universal (everyone feels it)

3. judgement exagerates it (our own and others')

I am learning to be more shame resilient, which means that I'm learning to be courageous in sharing my difficulties with at least one trusted family member or friend. That basically, (in Brene's words) brings shame to its knees.

I'm learning to accept myself and believe that I am worthy of love and belonging even though I am not perfect.

How about you? Do you have someone you can talk to when you feel that warm feeling of shame rising up in you? I hope so. 

Do you accept yourself with all of your imperfections?

Click on my button to see a list of all 31 Days posts. Thanks for visiting today!

This post is part of a 31 Day series on the topic Dare to Be and linking up with about 1500 other bloggers on hundreds of topics. Come on over to The Nester to visit!

Dare to Be: Creageous {Day 22}

This post is part of a 31 Day series on the topic Dare to Be and linking up with about 1500 other bloggers on hundreds of topics. Come on over to The Nester to visit!


There's no such thing as creative or non-creative people. But people who use or don't use their creativity.

~Brene Brown

No, you didn't read that blog title wrong. I made up a new word. Today.

Creageous=creative + courageous

The Brene Brown online Lifeclass I started yesterday has me putting on my artistic hat. (the one that I have been reluctant to admit I have.)

I have also been asked to do some pretty courageous things in The Daring Way class I'm in.

I think it's all warping my brain. In a good way.

*****************************************************************


Flash forward to today. I call my husband to see how his day is going. After he tells me that his day is challenging, I tell him

"You are creageous." (pronounced cree-a-geous)

an assignment for the Brene Brown Life class

He laughed. I laughed.

That is not a word.

Or, is it?

I say, "Uh, I meant to say courageous, but I think I just coined a new word combining creative and courageous."


I've never made up a word before. But, I kind of like this one.

It was a verbal blunder, but I think I'm on to something. 

I think we were all born to be creative in the way that we live.

We were all born to be courageous.

So, why not call it, creageous??!

Here's to you, an artist, living and making art in your little corner of the kitchen, workplace, concert hall or laundry room.

Here's to being creageous!. 

Do you see yourself as creative and courageous? I know you are! I'd love to hear about it in the comments!

~Anne

P.S. I am showing a picture which is part of the pledge I took in my online class today. I am imperfect and I am enough.

P.P.S It was courageous for me to take my own photo. I'm not a fan of having my picture taken, even by my own self!

P.P.P.S. My fingers aren't really crooked!

Click on my button to see a list of all 31 Days posts! Thanks for visiting me!