when you have an overcommitted flag waver

Linking up with other brave writers at Five Minute Friday. This week's prompt is "try". Fitting for those of us who dare to try to write for five minutes straight with no fancy edits. Come on over to Kate Motaung's blog to find out more!


I think I’ve got this little person inside of me. Every time I go to try something new, she gets out her little red flag and starts waving it with all of her might.

I’m not sure where she came from, or why she started doing this, but she’s done it since I was a little girl.

The Flag Waver.

I think she’s trying to warn me off of anything that might be dangerous or scary. 

But, she’s over committed to this. 

She’s a little too enthusiastic because she gets her flag out over the most seemingly mundane things.

Like trying watercolor painting

Playing with acrylic paints

Trying a new craft, like knitting.

She’s also full of what if’s.

I mean, full!!

What if you make a mistake? 

What if you fail? 

What if your work isn’t 

as good as so and so’s? 

You’ll be a failure!!

This flag waver isn’t my friend. 

She keeps me from even thinking about trying new things.  I have managed to silence her lately, because in spite of her flag waving, I have tried mixed media acrylic painting. I’ve done some drawing. Tried a new knitting pattern.

I want to keep working at silencing this little red flag waver. 

She doesn’t have the last word in my life. 

She needs to take the very back seat. In fact. She’s not welcome at all. Except in those times when I really am in danger.

How about you? Do you have a little red flag waver inside of you, warning you off of trying new things? An overzealous flag waver who isn’t welcome?

I’d love to hear from you in the comments!

Blessings to you, friend!

~Anne

When fears are like dirty socks

Once upon a time there was a little girl. She had big dreams inside her heart. She knew they were there, even though she didn't really know what all of them were, or what they would turn out to be.

Even though this little girl had dreams, she was often afraid of trying new things.

What if she would get hurt?

What if she would get lost?

What if she just didn't have what it takes?

She grew up being fearful. Whether it was her own fear, or others' fear projected onto her, she internalized it and it became her own. Many of these fears grew with her. 

As she grew older, the fears wouldn't leave. The fears hung around like dirty socks laying on the bedroom floor.

Like walking around the pile of dirty socks, she adapted to some of the fears even though they limited her. Some grew bigger and stuck like glue.


The fear of the unknown kept her inside a shell. 

The fear of failure kept her from trying new things. 

The fear of the future kept her living in the past.

Even the fear of success kept her from really soaring.


Then, one day, the little girl grew up. She had grown taller, older and wiser. 

She found out she no longer had to bow to the fears that had clung like dirty socks to her soul. With wisdom, she began picking up those dirty socks with her nimble and capable fingers. 

Each sock of fear she dumped into the basket of learning and hope. And, each sock of fear that she threw down turned into a possibililty.

The fear of the unknown turned into dreaming of what could be.
The fear of failure turned into permission to learn from her mistakes.
The fear of the future turned into anticipation of all good things. 
The fear of success turned into being true to herself. 

She also began to dig deep to learn where and how these limiting fears started. 

And, why she'd always been so willing to let these fears control her life.

St. Peter's Cathedral--NYC

They'd robbed her of her courage. They'd robbed her of new experiences. They'd robbed her of her self-esteem and self-worth. They had just plain robbed her of life.

She doesn't really know what's next. 
No one ever does. 

But, she's willing to live courageously in the unknown, knowing this is part of her journey.

She's willing to embrace her imperfections and limitations and work toward squashing her fears.

She's living wholeheartedly.
She's living courageously.
She's daring greatly.

Blessings to you today, friend! 

~Anne

Linking up today with the lovely Holley Gerth for Coffee for Your Heart and Kristin Taylor for Three Word Wednesday.

Making fear take the back seat

Linking up with Kate at Five Minute Friday, where brave writers gather once a week to silence the inner critic and just write for five minutes straight, not worrying about edits or backtracking. This week's prompt is "dare". 



I basically started this blog, A Ready Listener, two and a half years ago as a dare to myself. I was actually scared speechless to put my words out there on the “interwebs” for the whole world to read. And, possibly criticize.

What would people think of my ideas and opinions on life? Would they silently criticize me? 

Would they categorize me as something that I don’t want and didn’t intend to portray?

It took two failed blog attempts to finally get one going. It was so difficult to force the words out onto the screen and even more difficult to click publish. It’s still difficult.

But, I guess I've learned to push through that fear and intimidation of putting my words out there, because for two and a half years, I’ve been pretty regularly putting them out there. Putting them out, open to criticism and disagreement.

But, also putting them out there to encourage. The sub-theme of my blog, under the name A Ready Listener is, “pausing to hear the beauty in all of life.”

I guess when I thought about that pause, and the beauty that surrounds me daily, and my desire to encourage readers and bring beauty to their lives, to your life, the fear took the second seat.

Oh, that I will choose to make fear take a back seat in things that I want to do in the future. In things that I have a passion about, but a fear to carry out.

Fear must take the back seat if beauty is to emerge.

Thanks for stopping by!
Blessings to you, friend!

For when you feel weak and small

"In that shaky space is your juiciest wisdom waiting to unfold." 

~Anonymous

What is your shaky space? What makes your palms sweat and your knees knock?

What makes you second or third guess yourself? Or, what makes you want to crawl into a hole and never come out?

What if, instead of dreading those times when our knees knock and our palms sweat, that we actually embraced them?

What if we reframed those moments of fear?

Instead, we could imagine that when our emotions and intellect are put to the test, this is when our best and most purest self emerges.

We really are smarter than we think. Our Creator endowed us with the gift of intuition. Intuition is that deep knowing, that voice deep within that points us to what is best for us.

Trusting our intuition doesn't come easy for most of us.

We're programmed from an early age to not trust it.

Adults always know best, right?

What can we do NOW to empower ourselves? Because that is what really matters NOW.

To tell ourselves the truth.

To tell ourselves NOW that it's in those times that we feel the weakest that we are the strongest, because we are being put to the test. Tests are hard, but they bring out the best in us.

Just because we feel weak, doesn't mean we actually are!

The next time something bad happens or someone says something to make you feel small and weak, remember who you are and what you are made of.

Remember Who made you.
Remember you have wisdom residing within you.

And live within that moment realizing that beauty and wisdom are unfolding inside you.

It's enfolded within you.

Live, knowing what you are becoming.



Blessings to you, friend!

~Anne

I'm linking up today with Holley for Coffee for Your Heart and with Beth for Three Word Wednesday!

The biggest thief of a settled spirit

The biggest thief of a settled spirit is not just a thief in the night, although that’s when it strikes me the most lately. This thief sneaks through the door of inner peace any time in the day or night. Sometimes it poses as an angel of light. A deceiver. 

Telling you things that are not true. Things that poison your spirit. Things that make it anything but settled. Things that make it rattled instead.

This thief is FEAR.

Fear has been defined as:

False

Evidence

Appearing

Real

And, so it is.

Yesterday, I explained to my Bible study friends that sometimes I feel as if I’m living in the Matrix movie. I don’t remember much of anything about this movie (honestly, I didn't get most of it when I watched it some time ago), except for what my husband reminded me of the other day.

He said that in the movie, everything around the characters was a mirage, a deception, and only by taking the red pill were they able to see the truth. It was only then that the lights really went on and they saw through the deception all around them.

"The red pill and its opposite, the blue pill, are pop culture symbols representing the choice between embracing the sometimes painful truth of reality (red pill) and the blissful ignorance of illusion (blue pill)."--Wikipedia on The Matrix movie

Sometimes I feel like life is this way. Oh, everything around me isn’t a lie. That’s not what I mean. What I mean is that when I am not aware of my fears, I can tend to let them take the better part of me. I can tend to let them rule my life, and pretty soon, I am cowering to fear, instead of basing my decisions on the truth.

What will they think of me if I say that?

What will happen if I step out?

I have a hard time going to sleep. Tonight will be no different. I’ll lay there for hours.

What’s going to happen to my family?

See how these fearful thoughts can sneak in like a thief and steal our peace? This thief might even pose as

healthy concern

awareness

being in control.

But, these are fears that are really stealing a settled spirit.

“Fear always distorts our perception and confuses us as to what is going on. Love is the total absence of fear. Love asks no questions. Its natural state is one of extension and expansion, not comparison and measurement. Love, then, is really everything that is of value, and fear can offer us nothing because it is nothing.” –Gerald G. Jampolsky, M.D.

 Fear is nothing.

Wow. Haven’t thought of it as nothing, but if it is really false evidence appearing as real, it is truly nothing.

The opposite of fear is faith.

My faith is in God who says that He is Love. And, perfect love casts out all fear. (I John 4:18)

I held up my Bible and told my Bible study friends, 

“It’s like this is the little red pill.”

Sounds like kind of a crude comparison.

The Bible compared to a little red pill?

What God says in His Word is my anchor.  The truth and hope God gives is the anchor of my soul.

The Truth that can be relied upon when my fears seek to steal my peace.

Jesus says, "If you had faith like a mustard seed, you would say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and be planted in the sea’; and it would obey you." Luke 17:6

Lets ask the Author of our faith for more faith to replace our fears.

"fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:2

He promises to be faithful.

“…for He Himself has said, 'I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you." Hebrews 11:5b

These are promises that can lead us to a settled spirit.

Thanks for stopping by, friend!

This post is part three is a series titled How to Have a Settled Spirit. Here are part one and part two.

Linking up today with Coffee for Your Heart and Three Word Wednesday.

Dare to live wholeheartedly {Day 31}

For the last 31 days, I've been writing about things that I want to keep daring myself to be and do. It's been a great journey and I want to thank you for taking the time to come along with me!

Just the term 'dare to be' implies that it is a challenge and that it takes courage.

It will take courage to keep coming against the fear that rises up in me in order to live wholeheartedly.

By wholeheartedly I mean that I want to show up, be seen and live brave. I want to show up with my whole self, as Kara said yesterday, the good and the bad. 

It is only by showing up and letting my good parts and bad parts be seen, that I can live with a whole heart, and also be loved as a whole and complete person.

The past several years I've been intentionally facing some of my fears.

And, you know what? 

The fears that seem like intimidating, giant sumo wrestlers, usually end up being the most scrawny, wimpy, skinny ones in reality. 

They end up being surprisingly easy to take down. 

But, the key is in facing them head on. 

Taking that first step to face the sumo wrestler is by far the most challenging.

Now that the 31 days are over, I want to challenge us to keep daring ourselves. I want to challenge us to live wholeheartedly. To bring our complete and whole selves to all relationships.

To show up, be seen and live brave.

I am planning to dedicate my life to daring greatly. To giving myself permission to do the things that lead me to wholehearted living. In other words...

living with my whole heart.

Thanks again for coming along with me on this journey of Daring to Be. I hope you've found some permission here. I hope you've found some courage.

Blessings to you, friends.

~Anne

What has resonated with you the most in this series? 

What would you like to read more of if you could choose? I'd love to hear in the comments!

This post is the last one of a 31 Day series on the topic Dare to Be and linking up with about 1500 other bloggers on hundreds of topics. Come on over to The Nester to visit!

Who's your daddy?

“Fear hangs out right next to whatever it is you’re most called to do. That means the closer you get to your calling, the louder fear sounds. Keep going–fear is a chihuahua that sounds like a Doberman.” —You’re Made for a God-sized Dream, Chapter Five

This week, Holley (who's book is You're Made for a God-sized Dream) is encouraging us God-sized dreamers to write a letter to the "chihuahua of fear", because fear's bark is bigger than his bite. Here's my letter.

Source: Pinterest

Dear Chihuahua of fear,

Ever since I can remember, you have been yipping at my heels by day and staring at me with your beady eyes at night.

I think you started hanging around regularly in kindergarten, when mom left dad and took me and little brother with her. Oh, I didn’t ask for you. I didn’t want you. But, there you were, causing real-life nightmares at night, I-need-to-go-home-from-school stomach aches, and later on in college--the migraines.

What made you think you could hang around and prey on an innocent young girl’s dreams? Who told you that you had a right?

Now that I have a lot of experience and more years than I’d like to admit under my belt, I can see right through you. You don’t belong to me. You were never wanted, chosen or cherished. (in case you ever wondered)

Oh, I still battle you, but I realize that just as your bark is bigger than your bite, your words don’t hold any weight when they are measured up to the heavy-weight of the Word.  So, just in case you've forgotten what I've already told you dozens of times, I’ll gladly repeat myself.

I am a daughter of the King of Kings and I listen to His voice, not yours.

I don’t belong to you and you don’t belong to me.

When you try to scare me in my dreams, I will always stare you back down and remind you who you are.

When you whisper to me that I’m not enough, I will say back, I am enough in Christ.

When your close friend Shame taps me on the shoulder, I will say, “No. I am the righteousness of God, in Christ. There is no condemnation for this girl!”

And, my hand-made-from-God-sized dream? I say, take your paws off of God’s property!!

My Daddy-God says to me, “Do not fear, I am with you. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will hold you up with My hand.”

See there, Chihuahua of fear? That’s my Daddy speaking and He has the final Word.

Who’s your daddy?

linking up today with other God-sized dreamers at holleygerth.com

eyes wide open: sing yourself happy {day 6}

Joyce Meyer talks about how we can increase our own joy by how we talk to ourselves. I have been a believer in the power of life giving words for several years. Putting it into practice for myself has been another thing entirely. 

Choosing positive thoughts and words is a constant battle, especially if I am in pain. Emotionally or physically. 

I've had a history of getting tension and migraine headaches. In fact, just in the past couple of days, I had the computer chair set wrong and had to make another trip to the chiropractor for my neck. Right now, I have to be so careful.

Last night I took my mom to a Phillips, Craig and Dean concert. All afternoon, I had a tension headache, and I was fighting anxious thoughts as well, thinking that I would not feel good to take mom to the concert and really enjoy it. For me, having the pain is one thing, but then my fearful thoughts can easily compound the problem and make it worse. 

On the way to the concert I wore an ice pack around my neck. I had put Icy Hot on. And I prayed. 

I said, "God, you are going to have to help me with my thoughts. I know the joy of the Lord is my strength. I choose joy. I really need your help, though. And, I ask you to take this pain away, Lord. I know you are my Healer." Then, all of a sudden a song from my childhood popped into my head that I hadn't thought of in years. It went like this.

I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy

down in my heart, 

down in my heart,

down in my heart.

I've got the joy, joy, joy joy

down in my heart

down in my heart to stay!

Now, I don't believe it just popped into my head. I believe the Holy Spirit put it there. So, you know what I did? On the way to the concert, I sang out loud in my van. Yes, out loud. And, by the time I got there, the pain had lessened and I was actually joyful, and not fearful anymore. 

Joyce is right. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit in us if we know Christ. But, we have to choose to let God release that joy to make it real. Our positive, joy filled, truthful words can help us do that. They helped me do that!

I am learning to see my thoughts and words in a new light. That they have power!  If I have to eat them, I want them to be sweet.

see day 1 for all 31 posts