Thursday, February 25, 2016

what I'm doing with imperfection

This is me. With the thirty or so pounds I wanted to lose before going on a big European vacation. Instead, they're coming with me.

With the uncertainty about how I'll sleep, or get on with being gluten free in Germany, Denmark, France and England.

Yep, this is me. 

I have only one choice here with this disappointment that I didn't meet the goal that I wanted to. 

One choice in being gluten free in Europe.

My one choice is acceptance.

Acceptance of my imperfection. And, thankful for the gifts of imperfection, really. 

Because it makes me more aware that just because I'm going to Germany and Denmark on a business trip with my husband, and then ending up in England to see my daughter (after six months of her being there on a Gap Year project), this trip will not be perfect, because nothing in life is perfect! 

So, I have my imperfect self to thank for reminding me of this. 
For reminding me to accept myself in all of my imperfection. (no bikini body here. No going into any restaurant I want and ordering anything I want.)

Instead, learning the word for "gluten free" in three foreign languages and being ready with it on a piece of paper (or my cell phone) to hold up when we go out for dinner. My dear husband's suggestion. 

Oh, so romantic! Dinner at a sidewalk cafe in Paris, and I get out my little piece of paper with the French word for "gluten free" on it. 

It is what it is. 

And, I choose to accept it, because I choose to accept ME. 

So, here's to a three week European vacation with my sweetheart including joining up with two of our grown kids. 

Here's to me loving myself in all of my imperfections and enjoying each and every moment this holiday has to offer me.

Here's to staring at the Eiffel Tower all lit up at night. Here's to holding my husband's hand as we go for a walk in Denmark. Here's to us driving to Wartburg Castle in Germany and laughing in the car because we can't read road signs.

Here's to having that little piece of paper and my courage and acceptance ready at all times. 

Here's to me. Here's to us.

Here's to all blessings that will unfold in each moment. 

Thanks for stopping by today, friends!!



Linking up today with others at Coffee For Your Heart.

Friday, February 12, 2016

when the tears aren't invited

That time when you're in a new smallish group from church. You've never met any of these gals before, and you suddenly and irrevocably break down in tears, apologizing through them, trying to gain control of these emotions that have clearly over exceeded their limits.

That was me last night. The first meeting in a small group at church. My husband and I signed up to help "teach" English to non-native English speakers. An ESL type of class. 

Last night the men went next door to work on resumes for a couple of the guys.

The gals, another native English speaker and I, and a woman from Iran and one from Iraq, both could communicate a little in English. I wouldn't say well. That is why we were there.

Thankfully, Patty, was a teacher for 20 some years and came prepared with a sheet of questions we could go thru.

And, right in the middle of that, my tears came. They broke the limits of what I think is socially appropriate. They fell anyway, and I had to explain to those surprised eyes looking back at me.

 Swedish cousins Jan Gunner, Angelica and Ing-Marie 

I told them my dad came to America when he was 16 and knew no English. He had to be taught just like this. I told them I have Swedish family that recently came to America, and sometimes we struggled through words just like we were doing.

It just hit me. It really touched me to be sitting there helping this woman from Iraq and this woman from Iran say, "My name is ______. My address is_____.

It made me think of Dad. The tears would not stay inside. They just wouldn't.
And, these lovely women understood.


Thanks for stopping by today, friend!

I hope you are blessed!


Linking up today with other lovely writers at Kate Motaung's place for 5 minutes of writing just for the fun of it. No edits, no worries. Head on over to read what others have written on the prompt, "limit".

Friday, February 5, 2016

when you don't know where the muse went

Today is one of those days, in fact, it's been a few months now since I've written a five minute friday post. I barely made it to write a "what I learned in 2015" post.

I'm not sure what it is that has me so not focused. I think it's more than one "it". It's many little life things that get in the way of writing. 

Oh, they don't get in the way of wanting to write, but busyness chases the writing muse away. 

Busyness clamors for attention and usually gets it.
Some art has been competition, too. I love that. I would have thought doing art would lead to more writing. Maybe it will in the long term, but for the short term, no.

I decided today that I couldn't wait for the writing muse to show up. I decided I'd just get my duff out of my chair, stand in front of the blank screen to see what would show up. 

I decided to show up in spite of my muse seemingly on vacation.

Is that how you find yourself? in this busy life?

That the muse might be on vacation, or leading you down a path of no creativity. (or you might THINK you are not creative).

But the only way to cure the emptiness of muse, is to create art/write anyway. 

I am beginning to learn (takes me awhile) that it is in the doing, the showing up that the muse shows herself. Finally.

I'm going to keep showing up.
I'm going to keep showing up.
I'm going to keep showing up.

Hello muse.


Thanks for stopping by today, friend!  It's been awhile and I want to show up more often this year!

I'm linking up with a flash mob of writers over at for Five Minute Friday. Head on over there to check out the particulars and join in the fun. Today's prompt is the word FOCUS.  
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