eyes wide open: every day is new {day 19}

While I sit here at the computer, my little yellow canary, Gideon, flits about his cage. He stops to preen, then looks out the window at some birds in the bushes, all the while making those tiny jerky bird movements with his head. After that, he hops down to the clear plastic feeder and eats a few seeds. It is so amazing to me how little he eats. I guess that's where the saying, "he eats like a bird" comes from. He then hops over to the bell that is hanging under his swing, and makes clicking noises with his beak at his own reflection dangling there. 

Every morning, when I uncover his cage from the night darkness, he is already awake and has beckoned me to his cage with a few chirps. Sometimes even singing before I can get him uncovered. He is never in a bad mood. At least he doesn't show it if he is. I like that. In that way, I want to be like him. 

Gideon

It baffles me that he seems as happy as can be in his cage. I feel bad sometimes that he lives in such a small space. But, my daughter reminded me one time, mom, remember, he has such a little brain that to him his cage is  just enough. He is not like us. You know what? She is very wise. 

What does talking about my canary's daily living habits have to do with eyes wide open: seeing with new eyes? Gideon reminds me each morning when I uncover him, that it is a new day. A day to make a fresh start. A day to rejoice in, to live carefree, and to enjoy the space in which I live. 

And, when evening comes and it's time to go to bed, just fluff up my pillow and with no worries, go to sleep.

see day 1 for a list of all 31 posts

one way to clear soul clutter {day 4}

My sentimentality has created a soul burden.


As I opened the closet door, empty garbage bags in hand ready to fill and take to Goodwill, I wondered (as I've been wondering for months) where to start. It seemed daunting. A goal unreachable. Do I finally get rid of my kids' baby shoes? (my youngest is 19). What about my college notebooks from Swedish class? (I'm 49). Ooo....I might still want to cover that pillow like the ones I saw at Pottery Barn.

And then there are the two boxes still chock full with memorabilia from my Great Aunt Esther. Even though she's long been passed, somehow I got handed her doll dresser from the early 1900's and her high school graduation picture from 1918, among many other things. If I get rid of Aunt Esther's things, all traces of her will vanish from the earth with them. How could I do that? See what my heart goes through when I start to try to clean out? It's utterly exhausting.

I've been realizing what a time and energy consumer my "precious things" have had in my mind and emotions. I am beginning to see all of this stuff differently now. Not sure why. I'm a sentimental collector and at one time had a passion for each item that's crossing my hands as it passes into one of the bags on my floor. What I once saw as "gotta have this", I now see as extra baggage weighing me down. I'm still sorting out the reasons for this.

Aunt Esther and Me

I'm still as sentimental as they come. But this stuff doesn't have the pull on me that it once did. I'm different than I was just 5 years ago. I do know that with each bag of stuff off-loaded to greener pastures, my vision is clearing. My heart feels that much more ready to take in new terrain. New creativity. New vision. More space to breathe. And think. And dream.

I like it. 

I'm going to keep filling bags. I know I'm not where I need to be with this, but I like this new way of seeing "things". It's better. I'm better. I'm grateful for progress.


please see day 1 to see a list of the 31 posts.

How to live a joy-filled life

Today, my daughter turns 19. She has taught me a lot in her nineteen years.  In her honor, I've come up with the top 10 things that I've learned from her. Here goes.


1. Be yourself. She isn't afraid to just be herself, in whatever situation she's in. She lives carefree, and that is something to be admired. I tend to get bogged down in who I think others want me to be and stop being my real self.

2.  Believe you have something to say.  She started a book review vlog a year and a half ago. She has gotten some negative, and some downright nasty feedback at times. That does not stop her from just putting her two cents out there. 

3.  Don't take life too seriously. She started her freshman year at Iowa State this past fall. She met a lot of great friends from her dorm floor and at the campus ministry. Thankfully, she was very faithful to post pictures of her shenanigans all year on Facebook. From funny videos in the dining center to doing planking on campus, they had fun. My synopsis is that she had more fun in her first year of college than I had in all four years of mine.

4.  Enjoy the simple things. Trying on clothes as a four year old was an event for her. After slipping on each outfit, she would do a little dance in front of the mirror, kicking up her heels, or hand on her hip. This was an event worth celebrating! A week ago, she tried on a fancy dress, took a pic and posted it on Facebook. When she tried it on at home, she twirled in it to show her dad. Simply, joy!

5.  Don't let other people's opinions stop you. Even just to do a blog post, I have to push past the fear of what other people might think of my writing. Or my style. Or just me. There are so many things that Kara has done, or tried, that I admire. Recently, she took out her grade school water color set after seeing an idea on Pinterest. Next thing I know, she comes out of her room having water colored the Iron Man and Captain America emblems. And they are GOOD. Yes, she water colored OUTSIDE THE LINES, but it looks great. She doesn't let that bother her.  I would berate myself for coloring outside the lines and throw the thing away. I mean it. 

6.  Be hospitable. I tend to worry about the tidiness of my home. I use that as a gauge on whether or not I would accept for anyone to see it. Not Kara. She has had her two best friends over several times this summer. Our house is not Better Homes and Gardens perfect. Kara just says, "Mom, they don't care. Their houses aren't perfect either." You know what? I've really enjoyed having them in our home, and I'm learning that other people really do not judge me for having a few things out on the kitchen table that don't belong there. 

7.  Watch movies, especially Sci-Fi. You just might connect on a cool level with your dad and two older brothers. :)

8.  Hang out with people. Relationships are important to Kara. She cares about people, and it shows in how many people really like to spend time with her. She attracts people because of her kindness and her humor. I want to be like that. 

9.  Be a learner. Need a new keyboard installed on your laptop? If you are Kara, you watch a youtube video and teach yourself. She taught herself how to play a ukulele, and how to water color. She has gotten several viruses off of her computer by herself. She has written a novel during National Novel Writing Month. I don't want to shy away from learning new things.

10.  Love God enough to get uncomfortable. At Iowa State she took a class in prep to be a small group leader in her campus ministry. It was called Theology of the Gospel, and it was pretty hard core. They had to memorize a verse a week. They also had to find two people a week to give a questionnaire of the Gospel to. This made Kara very uncomfortable, but she did it. She approached a classmate to ask questions about their belief in Jesus. What an example 
to me! 

Thanks Kara, for what you have taught me in your nineteen years. Thanks also, that even at nineteen you have not forgotten how to live with a carefree and joyful heart. Don't ever let that slip away from you!

Love, Mom