Wednesday, July 2, 2014

How to have a settled spirit

The other day, after visiting with her aunt, my daughter said to me, "she has a settled spirit."
A settled spirit. Yes, I thought...she does.

I'd never heard that phrase before to describe someone, but it was so accurate in this case! She has a settled-ness about her no doubt. It made me start to think about that phrase.

 I don't know many people that I can describe with this phrase. I'm not even sure I can honestly describe myself like this. I'd like to. I'd like to be known as someone with a settled spirit.

A settled spirit.

What is it?
How can I get it?
How can I live it consistently?

This is what I want.

In body, mind, heart, soul, spirit.
Comfortable in my own skin. Imperfections and all. 
I'm not there yet.

Content in my home space and surroundings.
I'm not there yet.

Settled in my vocation.
What does that even look like?

Settled in what I'm believing.

A few years ago, or even a few weeks ago I would have told you, "yes, I'm settled in my faith. I know what I believe, and why."

This is still true about the fundamentals of my faith which is that Jesus Christ was crucified, buried, and then resurrected from the dead to redeem me from my sin.

But, I would say not settled from the standpoint that I'm realizing that some of the beliefs I've been hanging on to my entire life are false beliefs. Beliefs that no longer serve me.
Limiting beliefs.They are ruts in my judgement of myself, God and others that need to be challenged. 

There are thought patterns I want to change. Patterns that regularly trip me up.

And, these can be so subtle.

Anxiety about my health (even minor aches and pains)
Unsettled-ness about the future and my place in it.
Common concerns about my adult children moving into the world.
Unsettled-ness about my purpose in mid-life and beyond.
The ache to have an identity apart from wife, mother, daughter and sister.
The  yearning to have an influence on those around me for good, and on the world around me for eternal good.

Settled to me means:


Recently, I was lovingly challenged with one of my negative thought patterns, (or limiting beliefs). I was having a hard time letting go of a perceived wrong done to me by an acquaintance. 

The thought presented to me was that letting go of this offense would allow me to think of other possibilities for me. I wouldn't feel so trapped in an endless negative thought pattern of defeat. That I really do have options in front of me, but I might not be able to see them with this block of offense in my thinking.


Wow. This really made me think about this letting go. This allowance for new, clear, positive thoughts to come in as I let go of the negative.

And, this "letting go of the old" might just allow me to get closer to the goal of having a "settled spirit". 

For the month of July I'd like to unpack these thoughts:

What does it mean to have a settled spirit?
What things can we do to get there?
What does possessing this character trait look like?
How can we pass this trait on to others?
What does God actually say about it?

I'd love to have you join me, and I'd love to hear your thoughts!
Do you know someone who you'd describe as having a settled spirit?
Do you have one?

Thanks for stopping by today, friend!

I'm linking up today with Holley Gerth for Coffee for Your Heart and with Beth for Three Word Wednesday.


  1. There have been moments that I felt I had a settled spirit but as quickly as it finds me it seems to leave. God has so much planned for me and in this process I am not always confident or steady in the progress. I do however, have contentment in my life. I am comfortable with who I am and with what I am doing. I'm not sure if you feel there is a difference between the two but that is another area that could be explored. Blessed to be visiting you from Beth's place today. Blessings, Mary!

    1. Hi there! Thanks for your thoughts. I do think that is a great distinction to make. I, too, am comfortable with who I am and what I am doing in life (for the most part!). And, sometimes I feel settled, too. I guess settled in some respects and not settled in others. :) Kind of a paradox!

  2. Hello Anne. I could think of a friend from church who I believe has a settled spirit. She is someone I admire and love having as a mentor in my faith journey. But me. Not so much. You share great thoughts to ponder though because I'd love to have that settled spirit. I really enjoyed this. Sitting here reflecting on what you shared.
    It's always wonderful to have you join us for TWW.

    1. Oh, Beth, your words are a blessing to me! I am glad you found some encouragement here! I so appreciate you stopping by to share your thoughts. I love joining TWW! :)


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