when you're picked last

Do you remember grade school recess? I do. Some were fun. Some, not so much. 

I wasn't very athletic, and I was a little chubby. I was pretty much one of the last to be picked for the team, whatever game was being played that day. 

Funny, how most of the games that were played in grade school involved running. I think about that now, and I wonder why? 

Hmm. Thinking out loud here.

Sometimes i can feel "picked last" as an adult. 

Oh, it's not the same. I'm not playing kickball or Pump Pump Pull Away, but I can feel picked last anyway.

I'm realizing that this feeling is something I've carried over from childhood. Digging deep, I realize that by being picked last for games, and coming in dead last at the annual "Fun Day", I started to equate being last with my worth.

Not a good combination.

I started reading a book this week that has begun to heal this feeling of being "picked last", or to put it another way, low self-esteem.

The grocery store clerk isn't always silently mocking me. People probably aren't talking behind my back.

Lysa Terkeurst used the term "live loved" in her book Uninvited. 

 I soaked that phrase up like a damp sponge.

I think that's the key to kicking the feeling of being "picked last" in life.

I'm going to start reminding myself that I'm loved deeply.

I'm going to say, "live loved" to myself a lot.

I hope you do, too. Because it's true.

Blessings to you, friend. Let's live loved.

Anne

Linking up today with other writers for Five Minute Friday. Head on over to Kate Motaung's blog to find out about it, or join in. Today's prompt is "team".

lift the hand

Linking up today with other wild writers at Kate Motaung's blog for Five Minute Friday. We write for five minutes and don't do fancy edits. In fact, today, I didn't even reformat. Just added a photo. That's really wild. Today's prompt is lift.

What if you don't know what to do, but you know you have to lift your hand to do it. 

Anything you want to do has to have effort behind it, and initiative.

Is there a dream burning a hole in your pocket?

Have you had dreams come and weigh heavy, and then vanish into thin air?

Have you wondered what to do with the rest of your life?

What would you do if money were no object?

What would you do if happiness was the result?

Sheer happiness with no strings attatched?

Sometimes it takes some deep soul searching.

Sometimes the hand is heavy and sluggish.

Sometimes the hand doesn't know which way to go, so it's paralyzed, so to speak.

Paralyzed by inaction.

Oh, the ability is there. 

But, the initiatve and motivation are lacking for some reason.

That reason may be unknown.

Lift your hand.

Lift the pen.

Lift the brush.

Lift the saw or hammer.

Lift your eyes to possibilities.

They are truly endless.

Why don't we think this way more often?

The freedoms we have to create and make something beautiful from nothing are here. They are right in front of us.

What will it take for us to lift ourselves out of the un-initiative, the un-motivation to start?

What makes us stuck?

What if the doing something big (or small) is just in the "getting started". 

The lifting of the hand.

Thanks for stopping by for Five Minutes of crazy free writing!

Let's lift our hands and do our happy work!

Anne

choose the happy

Linking up with other amazing writers at Kate Motaung's blog today for Five Minute Friday. Five minutes of writing for the fun of it without fancy edits. Today's prompt is happy. 


Sometimes it takes work to find the happy. Life isn't always as you want it to be, nor how you planned it to be.

Is it possible to be happy even though?

Sometimes it takes work to find the happy.

But, sometimes it's in the work, or in the looking for happy that happiness is found.

I find that the older I get, the more intentional I need to be about finding my own brand of happiness.  I mean, the only things I get to choose in line with finding happy are 

my thoughts and my behaviors.

I cannot control those around me and "make" them "make me" more happy.

Can I?

I cannot control them. I can only control me.  I can only control ME and my happiness and my way of being in the world.

What will I choose to fill my mind and my days with?

What will I ruminate on? I can choose. It is my privilege to choose my thoughts.

I can either choose to ruminate on a disagreement I had with someone, and what I could've done differently. 

Or, I can choose thoughts that lift me higher. Choose the happy.


Painting makes me happy.
Smiles and good times with my family make me happy.
Writing makes me happy.
Having a cup of tea makes me happy.
Watching birds outside my window makes me happy.
Thrift shopping with my daughter makes me happy.


I get to choose what to focus on.  Sure, life is not always happy. What happens to me on a daily basis doesn't always make me happy.

So, I have to CHOOSE my happy.

How about you?

Blessings to you, friend,

Anne